While we lament that Facebook is devolving into a wasteland of content spam, there are still a few pages doing it right.
A page called "I fucking love science" has no doubt appeared in your feed at some point with a fun factoid or nerdy observation.
Former Star Trek actor George Takei shares a lot of recycled Internet culture on his fan page. The strategy has made him a social media juggernaut.
But there's another celebrity using funny, shareable content to build influence on Facebook -- it's God. And with 570,000+ fans and counting, he's generating cross-platform viral conversation that entertains the web and infuriates the faithful.
You've got a YouTube channel with great cartoons. Do you make those yourself?
Yes, I am the creator and make that all Myself.
Do you plan to expand that enterprise?
Yes, I would like to have a TV show someday.
There are lots of social media accounts claiming to be God on the web.
Wait … what?! How dare they?! Impersonate the LORD?! BLASPHEMY! THEY SHALL PAY FOR MAKING FUN OF ME!!@#$%^!
Why has yours succeeded where others have failed?
BECAUSE I’M THE LORD! Geez, what part of being God do you not understand? Clearly your human brain cannot grasp this simple concept, so I’ll give you some inspiring song lyrics I like from The Prince of Egypt.*
"There can be miracles when you believe. Though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill. Who knows what miracles you can achieve? When you believe, somehow you will. You will when you believe."
*That movie could have used about 9,000% more blood.
Do you ever talk to other social media Gods online? Do you guys have a clubhouse or something?
I’m omniscient. That said, I just learned there were other "gods" online from your other question. I’m still trying to find them. Does Zeus have a page? How many fans?!?! TELL ME, DAMN YOU!!
What's the deal with the pope resigning?
I called the Pope-phone one day and told the pope that enough was enough already, and he needed to quit. He responded by saying that I’d been "sleeping on the job." It was a messy divorce. I wish him nothing but the worst things in life.
Do you see yourself as a vigilante fighting Facebook ignorance?
Ignorance is a pernicious plague. Have you ever seen The Neverending Story? Remember The Nothing? That’s real, except now it’s called The Stupid. The Stupid threatens to engulf this world.
I and others stand against the forces of fear and hatred that bring naught but misery to you all. You are most welcome.
The LORD has spoken.