It is times like this we need the police.
The Australian authorities have stepped in to protect us all from possibly the most hated band on the planet and their goatee-chinned lead singer, Chad Kroeger.
If his marriage to Avril Lavigne gave you bad-lyrical dreams for months, his visit to Australia should have you putting multiple padlocks on your doors.
Nickelback's "No Fixed Address Tour," which kicks off in Brisbane, Queensland on Wednesday night, has police obviously concerned about the welfare of the Australian public. Not only is the band visiting Down Under, they have refused to declare where they will be residing for the tour. It is the stuff of horror movies.
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But fear not, sweet, innocent Queenslanders, the cops are onto these horrible people. The warning reads: "Avoid the area. It may be hazardous to your hearing and street cred." Stay alert, but not alarmed.
In good news, the police investigation might even work out exactly why Nickelback are so hated, because Treasurer Joe still wants to know.
Why are so many people down on Nickelback? Surely with Foo Fighters they are the closest modern rivals to AC/DC for sing a long rock!— Joe Hockey (@JoeHockey) July 5, 2013