Beyoncé Knowles turns 31 today. Luckily for her, I've created the perfect birthday gift.
Normally I give all of my close friends "Birthday GIF Stories" for their big days. So, let's pretend that Beyoncé is one of my besties (please, just let me have this). Here's my GIF gift to her.
A Night Out With Amanda and Beyoncé
Like any two normal BFFs, Beyoncé and I glam up together before a night out on the town.
"Start with a clean, fresh face," she tells me.
"How do I look?"
"Play up those curves, mama!" she tells me.
So, I squeeze into that bandage dress. Unfortunately, I was feeling a little bloated from our pre-game drinks...
She quickly snapped me out of that funk.
"Girls...girls run this motha," I replied. And with that, we lace up our heels.
"Yep, but wait. Should we bring the dogs -- erm hyenas -- you know, just in case?" I ask.
"All right, we'll take my car?"
"So, that's a no? OK, we'll take yours."
"Remember, when you walk into the club it's all about presentation," she tells me before we get there. "Oh, and stay behind me."
And then we dance.
And she pulls one of these.
"Wait, how do you do that?" I ask. "It's simple," she replies.
"Like this?" I ask.
"OK, I'll just stay behind you," I say.
"You doin' good," she says. "Just remember..."
And we all sing her the birthday song.
Then, we dance — a lot. Because that's what B does.
And it gets to that point of the night. (You know, when you start taking classy bathroom pics.)
I start to feel tired. I ask Miss B if we can call it a night, but she's just getting started.
I try to explain...
To which she replies...
OK fine.
But before I know it, the night is over and she's giving me a hug and kiss goodbye.
"Call me!" she says casually. NBD.
So I did a few times...
And just when I thought I'd hit rock bottom, she answered...
I am still dealing with the rejection. But I mean, in the end, would that night really have changed me as a person?
Either way, I will always have the memories of my night out with Queen B.