Here's a New Year's resolution to consider: Stop feeling shame and embarrassment about things that are totally normal.
A lot of experiences give way to stomach-dropping discomfort, but there are a handful you probably know well. They involve the human body and make us feel simultaneously vulnerable and judgmental.
If you resolve to do anything in 2016, make it refusing to feel bad about yourself and buying into stigma that humiliates others.
My experience eating my placenta is up on my app! https://t.co/0aC3YXxIgv pic.twitter.com/xcCEtVCvzb— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) December 14, 2015
Think before you speak out against the following things, and question why you feel you have to in the first place. Here are five places to start.
1. Breastfeeding
Breast milk is a natural and nourishing bodily fluid. We're uncomfortable with it because it's produced by a woman's breasts, which society reserves for sexual fantasies. For a woman new to breastfeeding, the physical transformation of becoming a food source can be jarring, too.
But breastfeeding is about the opposite of shame — it's meant to sustain life. So if you see a woman breastfeeding in public and your first instinct is to insist she cover up, stop to question why she should be ashamed. For more inspiration, check out the Breastfeeding Goddess photography series and these seven times women challenged breastfeeding stigma.
This is motherhood and it ain't always pretty. What's your #momtruth? #motherhood #motherhoodaintpretty #tmi #confessionsofamom #ididthat #iamnotsorry A photo posted by Elisha Wilson Beach (@mylifeisabeach) on Apr 18, 2015 at 1:50pm PDT
2. Nudity
The naked body is everywhere, but it's not easy for everyone to be naked. The standard for perfection makes it hard for us to accept things like wrinkles, stretch marks, blemishes, scars, folds and fat. Our impossible expectations for nudity, though, reflect what we see in advertisements and entertainment where bodies are regularly nipped, tucked and photoshopped.
Pointing this out doesn't make it any easier for people to feel comfortable when nude. So try instead feeling empowered by people who call out body shaming. In 2015, that has included actor Vin Diesel who responded on social media to comments about his "dad bod" and women who protested Instagram's ban of the #curvy hashtag. The next time you look at your imperfect naked body — or someone else's — think of a body positive hashtag that makes you smile.
Instagram has banned #curvy. So you can hashtag shit like "fetishes" and "hookers" and end up seeing all kinds of penises and boobs but #curvy isn't acceptable? Why are words like #skinny, #fat and #thin still allowed? #igistrippin #bringcurvyback #hashtagcurvy #curvee A photo posted by Eden Alexandra (@moonchildfairydust) on Jul 17, 2015 at 7:29am PDT
3. Menstruation
Women bleed and that's part of what makes the "miracle of life" possible. Unfortunately, that vitality has been hijacked over the millennia to make women feel dirty. Worse yet, the cliché that women are irrational and hysterical, particularly during their periods,still exists.
But think of it this way: A period symbolizes unique power. So educate yourself about a woman's monthly cycle, think about what it means to have a period in cultures around the world and do something, like create jewelry or run in a marathon without a tampon, to help end the stigma surrounding menstrual blood.
4. Body hair
From brows to pits to backs, we rarely tolerate unruly body hair. The sight, often a go-to punch line, challenges our notions about masculinity, femininity and cleanliness. But men and women alike are tiring of grooming themselves down to the last hair.
Men feel increasingly comfortable embracing their beards and several female celebrities, including Madonna and Miley Cyrus, have flaunted their armpit air. So rebel a little, or a lot, and let those eyebrows grow bushy like model and actress Cara Delevingne, get creative with your beard or go big with glitter pits.
#PANK #dirtyhippie A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on May 1, 2015 at 12:15pm PDT
5. Poop
Change enough diapers and poop becomes something entirely normal to discuss in great detail. But most of us are weirded out by bowel movements — even if we've all had them. This is probably the most challenging among all the bodily stigmas to deconstruct; there isn't a chorus of tweets and viral hashtag on the topic of pooping without judgement.
Try this instead: Consider pooping (or not) as an opportunity to think about your health since what's in the gut often contains the key to wellbeing. And if you want to get political about poop, think about how going to the bathroom can be an anxiety-filled event for gender-fluid or transgender people who aren't sure whether they'll face harassment for using a facility that corresponds with their gender identity.
So when you take that bathroom break, remember our shared humanity and do what you can to ensure that no one is excluded from it.