As America freezes through the month of January, Australians are sweating like a roast dinner. The temperature can skyrocket above 40 degrees celsius in certain parts of the land Down Under and the only way to avoid a puddle at your feet and a peeling skin is to turn the aircon on, pull down the blinds and put your head in the freezer.
Over the years, Australians have acclimatised to the terrifying conditions by employing a strict set of guidelines to survive. It means eating your iceblock from the bottom, sleeping on the bathroom floor and avoiding all forms of metal. In this world of extremes you can never let your guard down, or you'll end up a blistering, sticky mess.
Sarah Gorst, who runs the Facebook page Meanwhile in Australia, has put together this perfect list of signs it is has hit extreme heat in Oz. Pass the ice cubes.
1. The best parking spot is determined by shade not distance
2. Hot water comes out of both taps
3. You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron
4. The temperature drops below 32c and you feel chilly
5. In January and February it only takes two fingers to steer a car
6. You discover you can get sunburnt through your windscreen
7. You realise asphalt has a liquid state
8. While walking barefoot to your car, you do a tightrope act on the white lines in the carpark
9. You catch a cold from having the aircon on full blast all night long
10. No one cares if you walk around with no shoes on
11. You keep everything in the fridge, including potatoes, bread and clothing
12. The effort of towelling yourself off after a shower means you need another shower right away
13. You worry your ceiling fan is spinning so fast it will fly off and kill you
14. The fire alert system doesn't quite go high enough
15. Sticking your head in the freezer and taking deep breaths is considered normal
