These are the best Halloween thruples costumes
Heteronormative monogamy is out, queer polyamory is in.
That's true for many parts of this country -- or, you know, my Brooklyn block. Either way, platonic or not-so-platonic thruples are so *in* this year.
It's time for this country to retire their binary oppressive Flintstones couples costumes and replace them with far more subversive thruples costumes.
Here are the best thruples costumes for 2018:
1. The "Distracted Boyfriend" Meme
Impress your three friends who kinda sorta use Twitter with your version of this famous meme.
2. The Hanson brothers
With three blonde wigs, some oversized stripes and killer falsettos, your thruple will be transformed into the Xennial boy band of your dreams.
3. Three little pigs
Three little pigs, all in houses/cardboard boxes that are bigger than your apartment.
4. Laura, Peter, and Josh from To All the Boys I've Loved Before
Problematic teenage love triangles are the best love triangles.
5. The Brontë Sisters
One of you is totally a Charlotte -- a confident, brilliant young woman with a soft spot for intellectuals. And your moody goth friend is soooo Emily.
The least popular member of your group is Anne.
6. Annie, Brenda, and Elise from The First Wives Club
Honor the greatest movie of the 20th century by dressing up as one of three greatest women of the 20th century: Diane Keaton, Goldie Hawn, and Bette Midler.
7. BLT
Everyone's gonna wanna be either bacon or tomato, but what romaine lacks in flavor it makes up for in ChloroPhitness.
8. The Clueless Ladies
Apologies in advance to the person who has to play Stacey Dash.
9. The Three Kanyes
VMAs Kanye, MAGA Kanye, and when "Kanye used to be good" Kanye.
10. Three's Company
Somewhere out there there's a person who remembers this show.
11. Princess Leia, Luke Skywalker, and Han Solo
For all the polyamorous Star Wars thruples out there.
12. Three Nipples
It's not a mutation, it's a gift.
13. The Pod Save America guys
We're calling this the Dockers challenge.
14. President Trump's three wives
Ivana, Marla, and Melania: three women who've made a terrible choice with their lives.
15. Lady Gaga, Bradley Cooper, and the dog from A Star is Born
This Tweet is currently unavailable. It might be loading or has been removed.
Anyone can be Lady Gaga or Bradley Cooper. Only a very special member of a very special thruple will ever be talented enough to play the dog.
Thruples, 2018 is your year.
Heather was the Web Trends reporter at Mashable NYC. Prior to joining Mashable, Heather wrote regularly for UPROXX and GOOD Magazine, was published in The Daily Dot and VICE, and had her work featured in Entertainment Weekly, Jezebel, Mic, and Gawker. She loves small terrible dogs and responsible driving. Follow her on Twitter @wear_a_helmet.
