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Alternative Christmas ornaments to discourage your cat from climbing the tree

If these don't work, nothing will.
 By 
Shelby Slauer
 on 

Decorating the Christmas tree is one of the most fun parts of the holiday season, unless you have a cat.

Then, it can be a hazardous event putting all of your favorite ornaments when your cat may climb it and knock the whole thing down at any second.

That's why we've compiled some ideas for Christmas ornaments that should discourage your cat from climbing the tree.


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Cucumbers

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

Cats are classically afraid of cucumbers, so if you place cucumber ornaments throughout your Christmas tree, they should jump in fear in the opposite direction.

(But don't leave cucumbers by your cats' food dish, it's cruel.)

A sprinkler system

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

Think about installing a small network of sprinklers around your tree. This way, in the case of your cat climbing it, you can turn the sprinklers on in a moment's notice which will create a river that your cat must ride all the way downstream.

Added bonus: you don't have to worry about remembering to water the tree!

A laser pointer pointing away from the tree

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

A laser pointer ornament is a good idea if you aim it far far away from the Christmas tree, and then you'll always know where your cat is for the rest of the holiday. It's a win-win.

A bigger cat telling your cat to turn around while it still has the chance

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

Hang a bigger cat on your tree this year so that when your cat walks up, the tree cat can deliver an ominous speech that will make your cat want to turn around and immediately walk the other direction.

Fake branches

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

Consider finding fake branch ornaments that look just like real branches. That way, when your cat tries to climb the tree they will be fooled and the ornament will provide no grip for them to continue climbing, and they will fall right down to the ground where they belong.

Slippery tree ribbon

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

You can wrap ribbon around your branches as always, but this time cover it in mayonnaise or slime or something, so that when your cat tries to climb the tree it just slips right off like it's riding a Slip N' Slide.

A tree stand that makes the tree spin at blender-like speeds

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

This isn't a Christmas ornament, per se, but if you buy a tree stand that has the capacity to spin your tree at blender-like speeds, your cat will fling right off into the next room any time it tries to climb it.

An open cat cage

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

Probably the most simple ornament for discouraging your cat from climbing the tree is an open cat cage. They try once, they jump right into cat cage, they stay there for rest of Christmas season. Problem solved.

Covering the tree in Saran wrap

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

This isn't a Christmas ornament either, but covering your entire tree, ornaments and all, in Saran wrap will definitely make it hard for your cat to climb it.

A mouse with a gun

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Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

If all else fails, give a mouse firearms and hang it on your tree so in case your cat climbs it, it can claim self-defense.

Thanks for reading Mashable Humor: original comedy every day. Or most days. We're people, just like you, and we're trying our best.

Topics Animals

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Shelby Slauer

Shelby does standup in NYC and contributes writing to nice places. Someday she wants a nice back porch. Follow her on Twitter or check out her website, why don't you.

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