Woman sexually assaulted by Brock Turner shares emotional essay about being a survivor
In June, the woman who was sexually assaulted by former Stanford student Brock Turner read her victim impact statement aloud in a courtroom.
She never expected it to reach millions of readers upon being published by Buzzfeed, nor did she anticipate receiving letters of support from across the world, including a note from Vice President Joe Biden.
The woman, who goes by the pseudonym Emily Doe, reflects on that and other emotional moments in a new essay published by Glamour, which honored her as a Woman of the Year in its annual recognition of influential women.
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"[I]t was Doe’s take-no-prisoners telling of what happened afterward — the relentless victim-blaming; the favoring of Turner, a student athlete — that changed the conversation about sexual assault forever," said Cindi Leive, Glamour's editor-in-chief, in an introduction to Doe's essay.
The piece touches on the devastation of learning that Turner would be sentenced to just six months in jail.
"The violation of my body and my being added up to a few months out of his summer."
"Immediately I felt embarrassed for trying, for being led to believe I had any influence," she writes. "The violation of my body and my being added up to a few months out of his summer."
Though the essay is brief compared to the comments she delivered in court, Doe's intent is clear.
She writes about the infuriating reality of knowing that even in cases with strong evidence — credible witnesses, police at the scene, evidence of incapacitation — justice may still be elusive.
"I had everything, and I was still told it was not a slam dunk," she writes. "I thought, if this is what having it good looks like, what other hells are survivors living?"
She attempts to illustrate what that torment looks like, noting that even as she is lauded by strangers as well as famous, powerful people, she still struggles to define what it means to be a survivor.
When an online commenter expresses pity for Doe, remarking that they hope their "daughter never ends up like her," she refuses to let that turn of phrase shadow her every move. Instead, Doe becomes defiant, insisting on changing the meaning of what it means to "end up" like her.
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"[I] am learning to say, I hope you end up like me, meaning, I hope you end up like me strong," she writes. "I hope you end up like me proud of who I’m becoming. I hope you don’t 'end up,' I hope you keep going."
The essay concludes with a powerful message about surviving sexual assault.
"Victims are not victims, not some fragile, sorrowful aftermath," Doe writes. "Victims are survivors, and survivors are going to be doing a hell of a lot more than surviving."
Read Doe's essay here.
If you have experienced sexual assault, you can call the free, confidential National Sexual Assault hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673), or access 24-7 help online by visiting hotline.rainn.org.
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Rebecca Ruiz is a Senior Reporter at Mashable. She frequently covers mental health, digital culture, and technology. Her areas of expertise include suicide prevention, screen use and mental health, parenting, youth well-being, and meditation and mindfulness. Rebecca's experience prior to Mashable includes working as a staff writer, reporter, and editor at NBC News Digital and as a staff writer at Forbes. Rebecca has a B.A. from Sarah Lawrence College and a masters degree from U.C. Berkeley's Graduate School of Journalism.
