'Fifty Shades Freed' trailer is here and OMG can we please just get this over with
The Fifty Shades franchise is back after the holidays, and in case you've forgotten that this whole adult-ish mess somehow seems like it was written by children, the first trailer opens with our heroes saying "Good morning, wife" and "Good morning, husband" to one another in greeting.
Sigh.
But yes, Mr. and Mrs. Grey are married now, that whole dom/sub thing a mere memory from their wildly unhealthy power dynamic youth, right?
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Something like that. Since we've been desensitized to the lukewarm sex that these movies have been dishing, the "final chapter" looks to be something of a ... thriller? With Anastasia taking matters into her own hands, right guys?
It's all about as exhausting as one could expect, but hey, the good news is that for the first time in over 200 years, Hollywood has chosen not to split the third book of a trilogy into two installments. (For that we can thank an opening-weekend drop from $85 million to $46 million between the first and second installments. Call it the Divergent effect.)
We're not getting out of here without a sultry, anthematic, slowed-down cover song -- INXS' "Never Tear Us Apart" in this case -- and of course a visit from the villainous Jack Hyde, who we know is villainous because his eyes are really dark and sunken this time, like, waaaaay more. Has he been drinking the alcohols again?
We'll find out when Fifty Shades Freed finally releases us on Feb. 9.
Josh Dickey is Mashable's Entertainment Editor, leading Mashable's TV, music, gaming and sports reporters as well as writing movie features and reviews.Josh has been the Film Editor at Variety, Entertainment Editor at The Associated Press and Managing Editor at TheWrap.com.A finalist for the Los Angeles Press Club's Best Entertainment Feature in 2015 for "Everyone is Altered: The Secret Hollywood Procedure that Fooled Us for Years," Josh received his BA in Journalism from The University of Minnesota.In between screenings, he can be found skating longboards, shredding guitar and wandering the streets of his beloved downtown Los Angeles.