Microsoft is making Xbox body wash that absolutely no one asked for

Everyone named Kyle is legally obligated to buy this Xbox soap and then never use it.

Apparently, 2019 is the year of consumeristic fever dreams. Brands aren't holding back, especially when it comes to collaborations. After all, it hasn't even been two full months since Forever 21 dropped a bizarre line with USPS (yes, as in the United States Postal Service).

And now this: Xbox flavored (?) line of toiletries including deodorant, body spray, and shower gel. Unilever, Axe's parent company, is teaming up with Microsoft in order to make this collab happen. The products will be released in July in Australia and New Zealand under Axe's international line, Lynx. Still with me?

Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

The product line looks similar to other Axe products, except they've taken things to the next level (sorry) by adding the Xbox logo. The packaging also includes the phrase "Lift your game," which is inspiring in general, but even more so on a deodorant spray.

But dude, what does it smell like? Good question. And you won't need to go sniffing any consoles to find out. According to the item's description from GameSpot, the soap contains a surprising multitude of scents.

"Lynx Xbox is a fresh scent of pulsing green citrus, featuring top notes of kaffir lime and winter lemon, aromatic herbal middle notes of mint and sage, and woody bottom notes of patchouli and clearwood." It also contains a variety of "natural essential oils," which is good news for the jojoba deficient gamers out there.

This gnarly line of soap was made to celebrate Xbox players, according to Tania Chee, Xbox's Business Lead for Australia and New Zealand.

“We see Xbox fans achieve incredible things every day, and we wanted to celebrate that elevated skill, passion and determination by creating something truly special,” she said in a statement. Chee goes on to say, “Now, powering up can be as simple as a quick spray before you head out the door.”

It's unclear whether or not the product line will hit ever stores in the states. Until it does, we'll just have to live with regular Axe. Don't get your cords in a tangle, though. You can use any soap to "Lift your game." Just make sure it's more than a "quick spray." Please.