24 ways your brain rapidly changed after Trump's election
For many of us, it's becoming increasingly hard to remember the time before Donald Trump was elected -- that rosy, carefree time before we were on the verge of war with five different countries and our president knew that Frederick Douglass was dead.
Ah, the good old days.
Trump's presidency, just weeks old, has been so brutal and swift that it's been hard for the millions of Americans who oppose him to think of a time where his Twitter feed didn't consume all of our mental energy. Remember when you could turn to Facebook without a zillion different people asking you to call your Senator to oppose Betsy DeVos NOW NOW NOW?
Yeah, me neither.
Here's a look at unpredictable, unspeakable ways your mind has likely changed, pre and post Trump's election.
1. The question: "How are you?"
Pre: "I'm [good/fine/not listening]"
Post: "You're going to have refrain from that question for the next four years."
2. John McCain:
Pre: "He's lost all credibility."
Post: "YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON CAPABLE OF SAVING US FROM THE DARKNESS."
3. While you're on the train:
4. Nuclear war:
Pre: "In the past!"
Post: "On the table."
5. Dogs:
Pre: "If only we could talk to each other!"
Post: "Thank god you understand none of this."
6. Sleeping:
Pre:
Post:
7. New York Times notifications:
Pre: "Obama was slow in signing that bill -- I'm outraged!"
Post: "Oh, the House just dropped a ban on the mentally ill having guns --- HEY THIS ONE'S NOT SO BAD!"
8. Paul Ryan:
Pre: "The f*cking worst."
Post: "The f*cking worst."
9. Facebook photos of babies:
Pre: "Aww, your baby is sooo cute!"
Post: "Why are you posting this, do you not realize that the world is burning down, I hate you."
10. Authoritarianism:
Pre: "God that is devastating."
Post: "Okay, it can't be THAT BAD -- I mean people live in Russia, right?"
11. Bananas:
Pre:
Post:
12. While you're in the shower
Pre: "I need more soap."
Post: "I need to get out of this country before it becomes North Korea."
13. Your senator:
Pre: "Who's that guy again?"
Post: "PRIMARY HIM."
14. Twitter:
Pre: "Such a fun place, love following all my fav comedians there!"
Post:
15. Travel:
Pre: "Where's the best place to escape from work?
Post: "Where's the best place to escape from nuclear war?"
17. Maxine Waters:
Pre: "Who's that?"
Post: "THERE IS NO GOD ONLY YOU."
18. Dieting:
Pre: "God, I really need to get on a diet."
Post:
19. The Gym:
Pre: "Need. To. Go!"
Post: "If I get up from my bed today that counts as moving, right?"
20. The Cold War:
Pre: "We won!"
Post: "We lost!"
21. Mike Pence:
Pre: "Satan on earth."
Post: "I pray for the day you become leader of the free world."
22. Time:
Pre: "Just flies by!"
Post:
23. Chuck Schumer
Pre: "Wait, what does that guy do again?"
Post:
24. The election:
Topics Donald Trump Elections
Heather was the Web Trends reporter at Mashable NYC. Prior to joining Mashable, Heather wrote regularly for UPROXX and GOOD Magazine, was published in The Daily Dot and VICE, and had her work featured in Entertainment Weekly, Jezebel, Mic, and Gawker. She loves small terrible dogs and responsible driving. Follow her on Twitter @wear_a_helmet.
