Dear God, it's happening. The jellyfish are (still) coming to invade Australia.
First, they tried to disguise themselves as washed-up breast implants. Then, they beached themselves en masse. And now, new footage has emerged of the evil gelatinous umbrellas, gathering off-shore in some kind of silent conference of doom.
18-year-old Riley Watts and his friend came across the gross swarm of red bell jellyfish off the Western Australia coast. As Watts told ABC North West: "We were just heading out for a surf, got about halfway out and there were frickin' jellyfish everywhere, so we turned around and went home."
Then they took their boat out to get a close look. And those jerks were everywhere.
They may be soft-bodied and slow-moving but mark our words, Australia. They are coming. And they won't offer you a cool new language a la Arrival. Instead they'll just sting you.
Logical people will tell you that mass jellyfish swarms like this are simply the result of summer-long northerly winds. But we know better. It's a hostile takeover and you've been warned.
