"I honestly can't even believe it's a question at this point whether or not we should be celebrating the symbols of an explicitly white supremacist cause like the Confederacy, who fought to destroy the United States," said Late Night host Seth Meyers on Thursday. And yet, here we are.
As protesters topple Confederate statues across the U.S., Americans are demanding the country take action to address the insidious racism permeating society. NASCAR has officially banned the Confederate flag at its events, "doing more to lead right now than the President of the United States" according to Meyers.
The U.S. army has further announced it is considering renaming its bases named after Confederate leaders — people who, Meyers points out, were "violent white supremacists and traitors," and probably shouldn't have been given the honor in the first place.
"Confederates famously fought against America, and they lost," said Meyers. "Since when do we name military bases after people who lost wars against America? Is there a naval base named after King George III? Would you make American soldiers train at Fort Il Duce?"
So, of course, President Donald Trump leapt to the defence of America's enemies, slamming the idea that the U.S. military should stop celebrating white supremacists.
"Not only were Confederate leaders slavers, traitors, and white supremacists, they were also dipshits," said Meyers, citing General Braxton Bragg's "notoriously bad temper."
"No wonder Trump likes him — he was a racist psycho who liked to fight with people. They didn't have Twitter back then, but I'm guessing Bragg's telegrams would have been right up Trump's alley."
