"Folks, I'm afraid I have sad news for fans of competence," host Stephen Colbert said on Thursday's episode of the Late Show. Elizabeth Warren became the latest person to drop out of the race for the Democratic nomination earlier the same day, leaving Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders to go head to head. (Tulsi Gabbard is also technically still running, but you'd be forgiven for forgetting that.)
"The one-time frontrunner Warren made the classic campaign mistake of being able to finish a coherent sentence and not having a penis," said Colbert. "Warren is gone now, that's it, she's out of the race. Further proof that America cannot have nice things."
Colbert also addressed the other story dominating the current news cycle: the spread of the coronavirus and the government's response to it. Predictably, the response has been somewhat lacking, with Trump going on Fox News to publicly ignore the World Health Organisation's official COVID-19 mortality rate. Rather than 3.4 percent, he said he had a "hunch" it was "way under one percent."
"This isn't the art of the deal, you can't negotiate with science!" said Colbert, further noting the U.S. president believes it's fine for people with the coronavirus to go to work.
"Trump's like the mayor in Jaws but worse."
Topics Stephen Colbert Politics COVID-19
