Stephen Colbert roasts Pete Hegseth for eye-watering spending

$93 billion in September 2025 alone.
 By 
Sam Haysom
 on 
A man in a suit stands on a talk show stage, gesturing with his arm wide. The caption at the bottom reads, "Come on, Pete..."
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Pete Hegseth's department of defense has been burning through money like it's going out of fashion, according to new reporting that claims spending reached $93 billion in September 2025 alone — and items forked out for included everything from $5.3 million on new iPads to $12,000 on fruit basket stands.

"You're ordering fruit baskets so fancy they come with a stand?" says Stephen Colbert in the Late Show clip above. "Come on, Pete, if you need food at work do the normal thing: put a clementine in your tote and find it three weeks later when it's a furry grey golfball."

Colbert goes on to mention the Pentagon reportedly spending over $15 million on rib eye steak, $2 million on Alaskan king crab, and $6.9 million on lobster tale.

"No 'boo', they're just harkening back to our founders," says Colbert. "As Paul Revere declared on his famous ride, 'One if by surf, two if by turf.'"

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Sam Haysom

Sam Haysom is the Deputy UK Editor for Mashable. He covers entertainment and online culture, and writes horror fiction in his spare time.


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