The Top 100 has turned into Mean Girls. O.K., let's be real, it was always Mean Girls, but now it's official. Like, we might even be getting into Heathers territory.
Fortunately, because we have no life and an absolute obsession with pop culture, we're here to break down what we're calling the Shade Tree™.
One warning -- ish is about to get complicated.
Taylor vs. Nicki
This week's brawl started over the most-coveted of all awards: The VMAs. That's the MTV Video Music Awards. It's a show that used to be really relevant and interesting (see Madonna in a wedding dress singing "Like a Virgin," Britney singing "Satisfaction" in nude-colored clothes, Britney with a snake, Britney and Madonna kissing, Britney dancing like she was a zombie, Kanye interrupting Taylor, and of course, Miley dry-humping Robin Thicke). If we're being honest, however, this seems like a lame thing to get upset about.
It's the VMAs. It's not the Oscars. It's like getting upset about the Billboard Music Awards.
Anyway, VMA nominations came out on Tuesday and Taylor Swift's star-studded video for "Bad Blood" walked way with seven nominations, including "Video of the Year."
Nicki Minaj received three nominations, two for her 2014 hit "Anaconda" and one for her collaboration work on "Bang Bang." "Anaconda" was represented for "Best Female Video" and "Best Hip Hop Video." But despite being a cultural phenomenon last summer/early fall, "Anaconda" wasn't nominated for "Video of the Year." Moreover, Minaj's video with Beyoncé, "Feeling Myself," was snubbed entirely.
Nicki took to Twitter to discuss the slight, positing that if she were a different kind of artist and not a person of color, she would be celebrated and not largely ignored.
Hey guys @MTV thank you for my nominations. Did Feeling Myself miss the deadline or...?— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
If I was a different "kind" of artist, Anaconda would be nominated for best choreo and vid of the year as well. — NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Ellen did her own anaconda video and did the #choreo lol. Remember her doing that kick . Even mtv did a post on the choreo @MTV remember?— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
U couldn't go on social media w/o seeing ppl doing the cover art, choreo, outfits for Halloween...an impact like that & no VOTY nomination?— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
When the "other" girls drop a video that breaks records and impacts culture they get that nomination. — NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Ok love u guys I have to get ready. Keep reppin me, do it til the death of me. X in the box. Cuz ain't nobody checkin me— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
If your video celebrates women with very slim bodies, you will be nominated for vid of the year — NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Oh but trust me. I'll be on that stage to collect my awards for vid of the year. Feeling Myself & Anaconda. — NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
QueenBey hit me about Anaconda after the IG snippet was released saying how much she loved it. She was also VERY hands on w/FeelingMyself — NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
I'm not always confident. Just tired. Black women influence pop culture so much but are rarely rewarded for it. https://t.co/2xOvJzBXJX— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Huh? U must not be reading my tweets. Didn't say a word about u. I love u just as much. But u should speak on this. @taylorswift13— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
They're not missing the point, they're just attempting to overshadow the point. Oldest trick in the book. https://t.co/Y4dt1vKk6C— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Nothing I said had to do with Taylor. So what jabs? White media and their tactics. So sad. That's what they want. https://t.co/AfcwoyDvpg— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Ryan posted a headline of Taylor saying she loves & supports me. But not me saying the same to her. Lol. Their headline says I took a "jab"?— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
I'm so glad u guys get to see how this stuff works. Taylor took her music off spotify and was applauded. We launched Tidal & were dragged.— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
Lol u guys did we miss the deadline?? #MTV? A photo posted by Nicki Minaj (@nickiminaj) on Jul 21, 2015 at 11:45am PDT
nicki was making valid points about the history of racism in the music industry, taylor should be standing by her not making it about her— becca (@margaerytyreII) July 21, 2015
.@taylorswift13 stop using "support all girls" as an excuse to not be critical of racist media that benefits and glorifies you— berenice (@itsbereniced) July 21, 2015
I'm baffled as to WHY @taylorswift13 felt the need to come at @NickiMinaj for speaking on behalf of unsung black female entertainers..— Elgin Charles (@ElginCharles) July 21, 2015
All my videos deserve VMas and my album deserves a Grammy but I'll never get one because America doesn't like opinionated black women.— AZEALIA BANKS (@AZEALIABANKS) July 21, 2015
Meanwhile, Taylor Swift -- a.k.a., the most powerful woman in business (and frankly, the whole damn world) -- took offense to some of the shade that she presumed Nicki was throwing her way.
@NICKIMINAJ I've done nothing but love & support you. It's unlike you to pit women against each other. Maybe one of the men took your slot..— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) July 21, 2015
Huh? U must not be reading my tweets. Didn't say a word about u. I love u just as much. But u should speak on this. @taylorswift13— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 21, 2015
@NICKIMINAJ If I win, please come up with me!! You're invited to any stage I'm ever on.— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) July 21, 2015
The problem with Taylor's defensive tweets, as Mashable entertainment reporter Yohana Desta pointed out, was that Minaj was ostensibly alluding to a larger problem -- that women of color are often overlooked for recognition for mainstream awards.
While it's true Minaj may have been lightly shading Swift in the process, Taylor probably should have just stayed out of the entire thing.
On Thursday, Taylor surprised everyone by apologizing for the whole thing.
I thought I was being called out. I missed the point, I misunderstood, then misspoke. I'm sorry, Nicki. @NICKIMINAJ— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) July 23, 2015
Taylor vs. Katy: Part 1
Now we need to digress to discuss the ongoing and long-simmering battle between Taylor Swift and Katy Perry.
This spat has been brewing for some time but didn't become public until the September 2014 issue of Rolling Stone cover story on Swift.
In that cover story, Swift discusses the genesis of the song, "Bad Blood."
"For years, I was never sure if we were friends or not," she says. "She would come up to me at awards shows and say something and walk away, and I would think, 'Are we friends, or did she just give me the harshest insult of my life?'" Then last year, the other star crossed a line. "She did something so horrible," Swift says. "I was like, 'Oh, we're just straight-up enemies.' And it wasn't even about a guy! It had to do with business. She basically tried to sabotage an entire arena tour. She tried to hire a bunch of people out from under me. And I'm surprisingly non-confrontational – you would not believe how much I hate conflict. So now I have to avoid her. It's awkward, and I don't like it."
Swifites quickly surmised that the subject of the song -- and the interview shade -- was none-other than pop superstar, Katy Perry.
Perry basically confirmed as much, tweeting the day the article went live that people should "watch out for the Regina George in sheep's clothing."
Watch out for the Regina George in sheep's clothing...— KATY PERRY (@katyperry) September 9, 2014
So what caused the rift between the former award-show friends? Apparently, Perry hired dancers from Swift's Red tour while the tour was still going on.
Gawker helpfully put all of this together a few months ago, but here's the TL;DR.
Three of the dancers for Swift's tour for her album Red had previously toured with Perry for her California Dreams world tour. In the middle of the tour, those dancers were approached by Perry's people and asked if they wanted to work with her on her upcoming world tour for Prism. The problem was, to do the Prism tour, the dancers would need to leave before Swift's tour was over.
According to an interview dancer Lockhart Brownlie gave to The Examiner in Australia, the decision to leave the tour was because the dancers felt like Perry was "like family."
"Obviously we were with Katy for two and a half years, she's like family to us, so we were, like, 'absolutely'," Brownlie said.
"We weren't really dancing in Taylor's tour anyway so I had got a little bored and I really wanted to do a promo tour."
Working with two different artists was interesting for Brownlie. "The experiences were completely different," he said. "Taylor is very untouchable. When we did see her, we had so much fun with her, but she's a lot more protected than Katy. Katy's 28 now and can do her own thing. Her team are so lovely, so we have such a good connection. And this time around she is a lot more in control."
As a result, Swift penned the track "Bad Blood" on 1989 about Perry. The song -- and especially the accompanying video -- tell the story of a friendship turned bad.
Lyrics, such as "Did you have to hit me where I'm weak?/Baby, I couldn't breathe" signify the fact that Perry, a relatively accomplished dancer, was hitting Swift -- famously not a great dancer -- where it would hurt her the most: with her backup dancers.
In the bridge, Swift sings "if you live like that, you live with ghosts/If you love like that, blood runs cold," which could be an allusion to Perry's song "Ghost," about the breakup of her marriage with Russell Brand.
The feud was only exasperated with the release of the "Bad Blood" music video this spring. If you've deeply analyzed the video (as I did at the end of this episode of my podcast, "Rocket"), you could see it as the ultimate middle-finger to Katy Perry.
It has huge production values, cameos from almost everyone who is hot right now, and the underlying story is about how a friend (played by Taylor Swift's real-life BFF Selena Gomez) backstabs her partner. The entire video is literally a setup between Catastrophe (Swift) and Arsyn (Gomez) to fight it out to the death.
There are also rumors that Perry may be writing her own song shading Swift on her upcoming album, titled "1984" (a reference to the year she was born and also a burn on Swift's 1989 which was her birth year).
How Katy fits into the Taylor vs. Nicki feud
Twenty-four hours after the whole Taylor/Nicki feud started, Katy Perry decided to get in on the drama.
She tweeted:
Finding it ironic to parade the pit women against other women argument about as one unmeasurably capitalizes on the take down of a woman...— KATY PERRY (@katyperry) July 22, 2015
Twitter instantly went crazy. Because come on, Katy. If Taylor shouldn't have inserted herself into this whole thing, you certainly should have stayed quiet. Especially since it's already been 24 hours. Like, were you asleep yesterday or something?
Perry also took to Twitter to assert that the real travesty was that pal Rihanna's "Bitch Better Have My Money" was ineligible for "Video of the Year" nominations. Rih Rih will have to wait until next year.
The real travesty is where is the shine for #BBHMMVideo when VMA eligibility period was 7/7/14-7/1/15 & that gem dropped 7/1... @MTV— KATY PERRY (@katyperry) July 22, 2015
We'll give Katy that one, however. "Bitch Better Have My Money" is basically everything ever. Here's hoping it wins every single moon man it can next year.
Who joins next?
Anyone want to take bets on who gets involved in this drama next? I would bet Madonna, but something tells me even Madge knows not to get involved here.
Maybe Iggy Azalea will choose to weigh in.
Who else wants to return to 2011, when everyone was just chillin' together at the AMAs, before all of this ridiculous drama?
Update Thursday, July 23 1:07 p.m.: Taylor Swift has apologized to Nicki Minaj. Minaj has graciously accepted. Our long national VMA-induced nightmare of shade is now over.
I thought I was being called out. I missed the point, I misunderstood, then misspoke. I'm sorry, Nicki. @NICKIMINAJ— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) July 23, 2015
That means so much Taylor, thank you. @taylorswift13 ❤️❤️❤️— NICKI MINAJ (@NICKIMINAJ) July 23, 2015
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