Not quite dating but not hooking up either? You're in a situationship.

It's the all-purpose term for your in-limbo love life.
 By 
Cassie Murdoch
 on 
Illustration of two people in an embrace.

You’re not really in a relationship with someone, but you’re not exactly just hooking up either. We've all been there, but no one ever knows quite what to call it.

Now there is an answer: a situationship. Yessss. That is exactly right. Far better than the old standby “it’s complicated” and much more descriptive than “hanging out.” Such sweet relief.

The term was unearthed by Carina Hsieh, who wrote about it for Cosmo. She says she first heard it from a guy at a party named Tony, who said "Basically, we’re in this situationship where it’s like things either progress or they don’t."

Tony is a genius, obviously. But where does this leave us? Is there anything wrong with lingering in the weird middle ground between an emotionless hookup and the place where there’s a discussion and terms like boyfriend/girlfriend/etc. can be comfortably tossed around?

Cosmo paints them as very destructive and pretty much the main problem with modern romance. They urge you to "save yourself from the fallout and set boundaries early on. Normalizing situationships teaches people to lower their expectations and take whatever they can get from a partner, because hey, at least he likes you."

A situationship is nothing if not all about hope.

Hmm. It's true that for many the lack of a concrete label alone can be stressful. And there’s also the fallout to deal with when the situation comes to an end. A situationship is nothing if not all about hope, and when that fizzles it's natural to be upset. But you also might feel weird mourning something that wasn’t actually an official thing.

But on the other side, maybe it's okay to spend a little time in a land without labels. There's not as much pressure. If you’re not really ready for a full-blown relationship or if you’re not totally sure this person is the one for you (or even the one for right now), then a situationship is a perfectly legit period of testing the waters.

When you really get down to it, life is basically just one long situation, with very fuzzy boundaries and lots of messy emotions. So love it or hate it, at least it has a name now.

This article was originally published on May 3, 2017.

Mashable Image
Cassie Murdoch

Cassie Murdoch is Mashable's Culture Editor.. Before coming here, Cassie was Senior Culture Writer at Vocativ. She previously wrote for Jezebel and The Hairpin. Cassie spends most of her time thinking about and consuming cheese in all its glorious forms.

Mashable Potato

Recommended For You

A controversial dating app uses credit scores to create matches
By Jack Dawes
Man using a smartphone to check his credit score to apply for a loan to the bank. Online credit score ranking check concept. - stock photo


The best hookup apps for 2026: I swiped until my thumb hurt
illustration of hookup app icons on a phone screen

The best hookup apps for 2026: I swiped until my thumb hurt
illustration of hookup app icons on a phone screen

Trending on Mashable
NYT Connections hints today: Clues, answers for April 3, 2026
Connections game on a smartphone

Wordle today: Answer, hints for April 3, 2026
Wordle game on a smartphone


NYT Connections hints today: Clues, answers for April 2, 2026
Connections game on a smartphone

NYT Strands hints, answers for April 3, 2026
A game being played on a smartphone.
The biggest stories of the day delivered to your inbox.
These newsletters may contain advertising, deals, or affiliate links. By clicking Subscribe, you confirm you are 16+ and agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.
Thanks for signing up. See you at your inbox!