This one virtual NSFW Valentine's Day gift might just do the 'job'
There's a lot of weird Valentine's Day gifts out there. You can name a cockroach after someone or give them a golden butt necklace. But now you can also give them a virtual BJ. A whaaaat? You might rightly be asking. Well, it’s pretty much exactly what it sounds like, and it’s the heart of a Valentine’s day initiative being run by webcam platform CamSoda.
They’re calling it “B(J) My Valentine,” because why not?
It's a very cheeky, very NSFW gift for the most NSFW holiday. But sadly, you can’t just send these willy nilly around the universe. (Although that is maybe for the best, since surely a few awkward situations would arise.) Instead, the recipient must be in possession of a Kiroo Onyx, which is technically called an interactive masturbator and is basically a sleeve which you put your “member” into.
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Should you wish to send this virtual fellatio, simply select from a number of different not-subtle-at-all styles -- including “tease the tip,” “gentle hands” and the more aggressive “deep throat” -- and arrange them in whatever order you like to design a custom, er, job for your Valentine.
You then send them a link and their Kiiroo Onyx will deliver the gift on your behalf. Truly, what an amazing time to be alive.
Cassie Murdoch is Mashable's Culture Editor.. Before coming here, Cassie was Senior Culture Writer at Vocativ. She previously wrote for Jezebel and The Hairpin. Cassie spends most of her time thinking about and consuming cheese in all its glorious forms.
