Robinson Cano can't be stopped by 'defensive shits', according to newspaper

Mariners second baseman Robinson Cano is currently leading the American league in home runs and RBIs. One could say he has a way with the runs (so sorry).

To put it simply, nothing can stop Cano's streak right now; not pitchers, not fatigue, not industrial cleaning agents, not even more bowel movements.

This Washington state newspaper completely gets what we're saying with their headline, "Defensive shits haven't stopped Mariners' Cano." 

Shits, shifts: at the end of the day, what's the difference? Defenses can't seem to control the speed, intensity or regularity of Cano's offensive power.

Have you tried probiotic yogurt?

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